Thursday, August 30, 2012

Wednesday Wow Factor!

* Disclaimer * I realize it is Thursday.  When I started writing this post I thought it was Wednesday (my days have been a little off lately).  I didn't want to stop and I figured you would understand!   :)

Week 35
Start date
: 12/28/11
Initial weight:
Current weight:
This week's loss
?  (Will weigh again next Wednesday)
Total weight loss:
20 pounds

Last week's dream focus
: Rest.

What went well:  I haven’t given up on my dreams!  I’ve forced myself to rest and allow others to help me (and tried not to fight it).  I surrounded myself with uplifting people and words to keep me from getting down and depressed.

Challenges:  Pain, overwhelming emotions, and low self-esteem have been my biggest challenges this month.  I’m on a lot of new medication and it’s causing me to have emotional ups and downs, not to mention the outbreak of acne from the change in hormones (GRR!). 
I know I’ve gained weight because I haven’t been eating the way I was prior to surgery.  Lots of comfort foods and fast food (because it was easy and convenient for the family while I was out of commission) have added to this, in addition to practically a month of lying down and being inactive. 
I haven’t logged a meal since the day before my surgery.  I had to take a break from all of that and just focus on getting better.  I didn’t pig out, mostly because my stomach hurt more when it was full, but also because the thought of out of control eating made me feel gross!  YAY!  DO YOU UNDERSTAND HOW MUCH PROGRESS THAT IS???  IT’S HUGE!!!  (Move THIS up to “What went well”!)
So let me be frank.  There were times I wanted to quit this month.  I’ve felt awful about myself.  I’ve felt depressed.  I’ve felt like I wanted to give up on this dream of losing weight and being healthy, not to mention a few other dreams.  I’ve felt very defeated.  I was haunted by a past illness and dark time in my life.  It’s been rough.  But these feelings are natural and part of my journey.  I had to experience them to have a clear view of where I am now and how blessed my life is, even through challenges and trials. 
This week's dream focus:  Start getting back into my good routines like eating healthy, logging my food intake, being more aware of calories, eating less sweets, and surrounding myself with positivity and encouragement!

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